Lotion Addict

Um yeah. I'm totally addicted to lotion. I always knew I had a problem, I just didn't realize the extent of it until a few days ago when I realized just how much lotion I own. And use. Every day.

Because I have issues.

I use Aveeno face lotion. I have sensitive skin, you know? And I need something that lessens the redness and takes care of the pimples (I know, I'm too old for that, but have you seen me lately? Stress, I tell you. The bane of my facial existence). And I love the fact it has these shimmery beads in it so I look kind of glowy, even when I haven't slept in days. It also has SPF 15, so I'm protecting my skin. Very important.

Then from the neck to my ankles, I use this Dove Nighttime Firming lotion. Because I can use all the help I can get on tightening up the danmage Taryn inflicted on my skin. I'm not bitter, just proactive. And it smells divine. I sniff my arm as I'm falling asleep...

Of course on my hands I use this de-lish holostic lavender, chamomile and mint Anti-Stress Lotion. I keep that one at work, for when I need to relax, you know. Take a deep breath, breathe in the soothing essences, breathe out the homicidal thoughts. And it's not oily, so I don't grease up my keyboard and phone if someone interrupts my meditation and I actually have to do some real work.

Down on the tootsies, I use cocoa butter and vitamin E lotion. I used to used that all over when I was preggo, but obviously it didn't do much to stave off the stretch marks. It does wonders keeping my feet nice and soft though, I slather it on at night after my shower and put some cotton socks on. The socks only last a couple hours, I hate sleeping with them on, but it's long enough to soak up the buttery goodness. I guess.

And for those trouble spots, I have that Bath and Body Works thick one in the blue bottle. Wonderful. When my knees and elbows are looking a little ashy, I can show them some love with the thick and creamy. Okay, that sounded kind of nasty.

Last, but definitely not least, I have the carry-everywhere antibacterial moisturizing Juniper Berry lotion. For those times you have to use a public restroom and the cheap soap dries out your hands and you're looking for a little extra cleansing, or when you change a diaper and that antiseptic hand alcohol does the same thing as the cheap restroom soap. Got it.

So how many is that? Six. On a daily basis? Do they have an LAA meeting in MArin somewhere?