Month Twenty-Six

Girl, if there terrible-twos are about testing limits, we have jumped in head first! This month has been full of surprises, demands, hissy-fits, tears and hugs. Your pushing it, and I'm proud of you for asserting your independence in a little 2'9" 24lb body, but ... I'm tired.

The roller coaster started with more obvious food preferences, no more oatmeal or quesadillas (which you had been living off of for many months) and all of a sudden you are actually asking for certain foods, which is awesome, except when you only wanted to eat blackberries for days. Because Love, you will see if you have your own children, blackberry-filled diapers are no joke.

Then the teething kicked in again, and the bottom two second molars were a breeze, but the top two knocked your socks off, and you went from Ms. Independent to Ms. I-Need-You-Mama-More-Ice-Please. And I struggle so much with being available and making sure that you always know you can count on me, but on the other hand I don't want you to become so dependent that you cry whenever I leave the room, and regress to be coddled. It's hard, but pfffft. Shows how much I know about preschoolers.

Sure enough, the next week you are a full-fledged Gemini, screaming at the top of your lungs "Mama, Mommy, need you, help please, up, up, mas besos, more hugs, up Mama, Mama sing song, Mama come, Mama sit, up Mama, no down, no down, more hugs, mas besos, love you, Mama ..." and the next second, when Papa is home from work and you have a new focus, "Mama go away, in house Mama. Now."

Right. I'll get one that now.

But I love it. I may not necessarily enjoy every second of it, but it's so amazingly cool to see you, really see you, and I love who you are, who you have been and who you are becoming. My wish for you this month is that you continually evolve. I hope you don't ever get stuck in being what anyone expects of you, I hope you are an individual and that your tastes and moods, and styles and interests change as your life does. I know you'll be dynamic.

I do have to say, this month has been packed, and while I'm looking forward to some down time from the birthdays and play dates, you are incredibly adaptable and have quite a few boyfriends. But although you only have one little girl your age you sometimes see, you've become a rough and tumble girly girl. You'll jump and run and play and wrestle with the boys, and do it in the pretty dress you picked out that morning. Or throw your dolls and play with monster trucks and trains, ride bikes and let your cousins puch you on their skateboards and scooters, but the minute someone is hurt, you immediately get concerned, and make sure 'Boo-Boo Rescue' is on the way. I love that about you. So carefree and unconcerned with gender roles right now, but always the nurturer.

Well Darling, I keep saying it, and I mean it more than ever. I love you so much more that I thought humanly possible. The rest of this year is going to hold some major changes for you, but I know you'll get through it, and be a womderful big sister. Which reminds me, you repeat everything we say right now. You've started calling Papa 'Babe' because that's what I yell when I need him, or if he calls to me, you'll yell 'What?" like I normally do. You tell the puppies to 'hush, stop barking' and you remember events vividly and will explain them again and again, repeating over and over if someone got an ouchie or you went to play with a friend down the street. I just wanted to bring this up because when your sister is 2, and you are almost in kinder and she's following you around repeting what you say, I just want written proof that you did the same thing first.

I love you,
Mama.