What am I?

I'm on both sides of the fence at once.

I don't balance anything, rather, I swing wildly from one extreme to the next.

I love and abhor simultaneously.

I can change my mind in a matter of seconds, from wholheartedly feeling one way to defending the other to the death.

I'm not normal.

I feel most alive when I'm angry.

I rarely ever feel truly happy.

***

I used to blame these wild extremes that co-exist within me on hormones. Then maybe it was because I was bipolar. And now... now I don't know. Now I am who I am.

***

I'm a bitch, but possibly the best friend you could have.

I'm rude and arrogant and self-conscious.

I'm painfully honest and conscientous to a fault.

I'm the hardest-working slacker I know.

I feind for praise and cower under attention.

***

I'm miserable.